I posted this pic on my Instagram stories a few months ago and it got a lot of hype. I received messages from so many of you – who saw how they were being presented with 2 choices in life, to Evolve or Repeat.
One woman shared that she’s taking a sabbatical from work in order to discover who she really is after years of grinding. She doesn’t know what’s next, but she knows she needs to pull this plug because the glamorous life she appears to be living on the outside is no longer working for her on the inside.
She wants “more.” A family and a bright future.
She must Evolve.
Another woman told me that as a new, working mom she feels like she’s pushing through resistance every moment of everyday. She’s tried and afraid, feeling more and more stretched. She knows that it’s not possible to keep up this rhythm without completely losing it. She can’t continue on like this anymore.
She wants her “freedom” back. And she knows it’s time to hire some help.
She must Evolve.
Where in your life are you feeling called to Evolve?
When I became a mom the first few weeks and even months were magical. But soon after – it was quiet. The visitors were gone and there were no more home cooked meals. I was lonely, and I felt empty and lost. I felt trapped inside my house (and also in my own mind).
Where did “I” go?
What happened to my dreams and my life?
Will I ever be able to prioritize ME again?
These questions felt selfish – so I never spoke them out loud until much later.
Meanwhile, the many sleepless nights led me to doubt – whether I could really become the calm, confident, cool Mom I always imagined I could Be. I felt like I didn’t know who I was anymore.
I was being forced to Evolve because in this case – while I was in a broken and fragile state – repeating patterns from the past was no longer an option for me. Everything in my environment had changed.
My introduction to Motherhood shook me.
It forced me to Become a Mom.
Who I was on the other side of Motherhood was a changed person.
Sometimes life happens for us in these ways. Our environment changes so much – that we are literally forced to evolve. There’s no going back…
Have you experienced a moment like this in your life?
Are you experiencing it now?
Where are you being called to Evolve?
Perhaps you’re at the helm of your job, your kids, or your bank account…
OR perhaps you’re realizing that :
…. who the world told you you were “supposed to” be – OR – who you told yourself you were “supposed to” be – is just not working anymore…
That little voice inside of you is saying – it’s time for a change, Girl…
Let’s do this already.
But here’s the thing… the only way out of uncertainty is by moving through it.
You must step into “the unknown” – and walk through one uncertain situation after another – to arrive at this next version of YOU.
What is it going to take to become Her? … a woman who’s living in alignment with the truth that lives inside of her?
Answering this question is an internal quest.
Let’s go there.
And we’ll start by looking at what happens to us when we don’t choose to evolve.
What happens when you Repeat?
- You play small
- You self sabotage
- You rely on your daily routines to give you purpose and meaning
- You find yourself re-learning the same ‘ol life lessons again and again
- You live like you’re a victim of your circumstances and continue to attract the same negative vibes back into your life again and again.
- It’s exhausting.
What happens when you Evolve?
- You take a risk and it feels necessary and somewhat thrilling
- You’re doing something great for yourself
- You become and upgraded version of You
- You become unrecognizable as you release one unhealthy pattern after another
- You are magnetic – your truth emanates from your being – and other people feel uplifted in your presence
- You see that as you act courageously again and again – so much is possible.
- You know that you have the power to transcend your self-limiting beliefs and you can set yourself free now
- You are happier and are shining from the inside out
- You attract new people, places, and things into your life that feels aligned.
How do you know where to Evolve next? Here are 5 questions to ask yourself.
Take an honest assessment of your life.
What is your mind thinking about all day?
What’s keeping you up at night?
What’s keeping you from being present?
What do you want that you don’t currently have?
Where did you imagine yourself to be by now?
Make a list.
Do you want to learn to love your body and STOP the self shaming thoughts and actions?
This is possible, I have done it.
Do you want to get pregnant after receiving a diagnosis that may cause you to believe that’s not a possibility for you?
This is possible. I’ve done it.
Do you know you need to leave a relationship?
… Forgive a family member?
… Start your own business?
… Ask for more help?
You owe it to yourself to explore the desires in your heart.
And you’re already being shown the pathway to make the changes you know you need to make through your life-circumstances – mostly the uncomfortable ones. Lean in.
If your intuition has been whispering the same things to you again and again – it’s time to start listening.
It’s likely that your soul is saying – enough already – let’s grow and expand OUT of THIS and into THAT.
“THAT” being the sum of your desires.
“Repeating” will only cause you feeling victimized, invisible, and powerless as you experience more of the same.
You deserve more.
Take a stand for what you truly want in life.
And in the process, cut out all things that only bring you down, lower your vibration, and cause you to feel “less than”, “not capable”, “and not good enough.”
You can take your power back…
One choice at a time.
And yes, you have to make choices – powerful ones.
You have to learn how to become your own best advocate. Placing your personal well being at the forefront of your mind – everyday – with each decision you make.
Will this food make me feel good?
Well spending time with this person leave me feeling fulfilled?
What do I really need to be doing with my free time?
What activities will be good for me now?
Who do I need to learn from?
Who can I ask for help?
Three personal development activities that will help you answer these life-questions on your own.
I have encouraging news…
You can do this work on your own. Or you can hire a coach or a therapist to help you.
I do not recommend taking these questions to a friend though. Your friend is not trained in being unbiased – by knowing how to not insert their own opinion based on their life-circumstances – they’re not going to be the right person to lean on. Their feedback may only cloud your own judgement even if they are well-intentioned.
Our goal here is to teach your internal guidance system LEAD you.
Also known as, your intuition.
Do you want to know how to be a powerful decision maker? You must learn how to tune up that still, small voice from within and act upon its messages to you.
Here are some self-coaching strategies that will help you tune into that inner voice in order to sort through your questions right now:
Work it out in your journal.
Start by writing out your frustrations and your dissatisfactions about life. Let it rip! Remember no one else will be reading this except for you and you can even burn it when you’re done if you’d like. Next once you’ve blown off some steam, ask some questions that are on your heart. Write them down and leave them with a question mark. Pause. See if an answer emerges within you and write it down. I always recommend ending on a note of thankfulness. Gratitude is powerful.
Spend time in meditation.
Ask yourself a question out loud and wait for an answer. It may take some time but it will come. It will come when your mind is not “thinking.” Use meditation to let your thoughts pass – then sit inside of the “nothingness”, a blank-focused-mind, with your question in mind and see if a response emerges for you. Be patient and be consistent. All you have to do to get started is to sit in a quiet space. There is no right way to do this. And yes, it will be uncomfortable the first few times because your brain will likely have a hard time quieting down. Be with it! Sticking with it will be so worth it – I promise! I bring all of my problems to my meditation practice to be worked out.
Ask the unforeseen forces of the universe for help.
Call it prayer or whatever you’d like. It doesn’t matter what you believe. This can be a very powerful tool if you are open to it. When we believe in something bigger than ourselves, the burdens that we carry in life feel less heavy and hard to deal with. Having “hope” that guidance is coming is a very encouraging perspective.
A final note:
If you’re dealing with a life situation that hasn’t been working for you, you owe it to yourself to make a change.
You owe it to yourself to evolve.
You don’t have to stay stuck.
You can always choose a different path.
Take responsibility for your life – let go of your victim stories – and really go for it this time!
The radiant YOU that’s on the other side of this “evolution” will thank you for your courage and bravery to put one foot in front of the other.
This is all it takes.
Small actions every single day.
I believe in you.
Are you struggling with a difficult situation and would you like a little help?
As a certified coach, I can help you navigate the “unknown” – you shouldn’t have to do it alone. Here is what other people had to say about their experiences. ( ← click here) If you’d like to experience what working together would be like – send me a personal message at [email protected] and I will reply back with some advice – right away.
Thank you to one of my friends, Nicole Emerick, for inspiring this blog post. Thank you for being who you are in this world – a true genius.